22 Grand Job

In the city, it’s alright.

I’ve been told I work too hard.  I dont do a particulary taxing job.  I have to pester people to get some more rewarding work out of them.  Sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t.  I get paid pretty well for what I do, so for alot of the time I just get on with it.

I tend to have a smile on my face for the majority of the day because that is me, but occaisionally I do get stressed and throw a mini tantrum in my head and sometimes it spills out.  This happened a few times last year.  I think its because I don’t take holidays.  My old boss forced me to take holidays.  If it wasn’t for them I would have probably taken the whole of December off.  I get 4 weeks holiday and I took 3 of them between November and December.  This doesn’t sound so bad, but my holidays run from January to December.

What’s the point of taking holidays when you can’t think of anything to do.  I don’t like to take days off if i’m just going to sit at home.  I need a purpose, an activity.

I can’t do holidays with friends.  I would get frustrated as I like to go explore at my own pace.  This is sometimes fast or slow, but I wouldn’t want to burden someone with my way of moving.  This is why I went to two festivals on my own.  Well, one was with people, but I never saw them when we were there.  I slept lots due to not taking holidays.  This was very silly as it’s all about the music for me, as some of you may have found out by now.

Festivals are quite cool to go to on your own.  I find it a bit frustrating if you have someone trying to talk to you when you are in the zone while listening to your favourite band.   Going on your own makes you discover so much more.  Sitting in a sunny field with a copy of the Guardian, Guardian branded flip flops, some Bloc Party wannabe band playing in the background and bad lager is a great thing to do.  You should try it.  To be honest, this only happened as no one else wanted to go and I missed the year before as people said the same.  There was no way I was going to miss it again.

So, back to my point.  What is the point of lying around doing nothing.  I need things to do, and I need to do them with someone.  I can only go on holiday on my own or with another half.  They complete it.  Someone you can completely relax with.  I’ve been on a few trips like this, but not enough.  Two particular trips definitely bring back great memories.

I’ve been planning a trip away to Japan for almost a couple of years now.  I won a competiton and have found a few cool trips to go on, but the company I have to book through keep denying me these trips of a lifetime.  The past two years were the perfect time for me to get away and clear my head, but it still hasn’t happened.  I may have not come back.  Maybe one day.

This year, I have promised myself a break.  Even if it is only on my birthday.  It was going to be Japan, but lets see what comes up.  I hope something wonderful comes up.  I may have to let someone take me away.

Have I spent too much time on my own and am now a grumpy old man?

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~ by gwane on 30/04/2009.